Chapter 4
One of my favorite things about having a suite was the TV and VCR. I taped every episode of Days and our friends came over on Friday night and watched them. Sounds like a boring thing to do but sometimes you just needed a little calmness. What better way than to figure out whether Shawn and Belle were finally going to figure out that they had a brother in common, and if Chloe could make it singing Opera in our city. One such night we had gathered a huge crowd, some people just came for the fun. Mandy and I loved to yell at the TV and we had Taylor, Zac and Isaac doing it too. When their friends found this out they came just for the blackmail. We cooked popcorn and snuck fruit and chips from the cafeteria. When college students are hungry enough…well you get the drift
“Hey Melissa pass the popcorn”, said James who was one of their friends
“Shhh…Brady is about to punch Phillip for the hundredth time. It’s a integral part of the Days experience, just watch.”
“If I watch then I’ll become addicted like half the people here that you’ve infected with this TV show. It’s just a stupid soap opera.”
Collective “Shhhhhh”
One thing you must understand about a soap fan. Even if they did tape the show commercial breaks cannot be wasted. This is your time to talk, use the facilities, or get more food. The long break in the middle is the best of them all, in which you could do all of these things and still get back in time. This was one such break so I hightailed it for the bathroom because after 4 hours several Dr. Peppers gets to you. (Day 9)We ended up tying for positions but Mandy let me go first.
“Hey Melissa I have something important to tell you. Promise you won’t say anything until I’m done?”
“You picked the time when I’m going to the restroom to tell the “such important thing”. I can’t promise I won’t say anything. You know how wondrously witty I am and serious times.”
“Fine I’ll take that. Guess who’s in town. Come on guess.”
I responded by flushing. “I hate guessing because I never get it right then I say random things and, well just tell me.”
“Phillip is in town and I invited him over. Tonight, to watch Days because I know how you got him hooked over the summ…”
“Excuse me I did not just hear what you said. So do we still own the same kind of toothpaste? Because you know how freaky weird twin psychosomatic we are, even more than my own twin. Just another thing that connects us together. Like that one time when we ended up getting each other the same Christmas gift last year. It’s too bad we couldn’t get scholarships to the same college and not room..”
“Look I’m going to let you ramble about random things, but I know you know Phillip is coming here tonight after he gets settled in at the hotel. You have to face your fears with him. I don’t know why y’all split up in the first place, but It’s time you faced up to him again.”
“I could have spent my whole life running and you just spoil it for me. I know you’re all in on it. My whole family loves him, even your brother Brent, who never said he’d like any of our boyfriends. Well it’s not gonna work. I’m strong. And how dare you I thought you were my best friend.”
Then I calmly left the bathroom and flounced back on the couch. Why did he have to come around here and mess with my life again? He was fine in his great life and here I was making a new one for myself.
(Day 10)Finishing the remainder of Days was hard, knowing that any moment a knock could be heard on the door and Phillip would be there in all his music loving beautifulness. Friday’s and the last show was the best of all of them, and I quickly lost track of all worry. Shawn told Belle that he found out who their brother was and she was on the verge of breaking up with him when a knock sounded from the door.
Taylor yelled, “Come in it’s open,” from his position on the bed. He entered and the naging fear blasted me full force. So this was what I had been dreading all this time…great.
“Hey this is Melissa’s residence?”
Oh yes this was the Phillip I knew, flashing everyone a brilliant smile and walking in as if he owned the place. I slouched lower and lower into the couch trying to hide between Zac and Taylor. Everyone turned away from the Hourglass signaling the end of Days and looked at this boy who was impeccably dressed in designer labels. I was doomed. There had to be a great explanation for this guy but I had none to give and they wouldn’t give up until there was one.
“Oh yeah, who are you,” asked Isaac.
“I’m Melissa’s friend, Phillip.”
“Hi Phillip,” I croaked and uncrumpled myself from between the boys.
“Melissa, I’ve missed you so much. Is your party over?”
“Ahh well our weekly marathon is done, but everyone is free to hang out until Taylor and I fall asleep, or kick them out.”
“Oh well then I’ll join you.”
“Everyone this is Phillip, Phillip this is everyone.”
“You still haven’t lost that wit.”
“Yes, well Mandy introduce him to our friends while I go fix some more popcorn.”
So I escaped properly and busied myself with random popcorn making even though everyone was full and I knew it. I just had to escape that gaze. Someone taped me on the shoulder and shook me out of the haze I was in.
“Goodness you’re jumpy.”
“Yes well I just wasn’t expecting him to come and well…nothing. Let’s get this popcorn fixed, Taylor.”
“What’s up with you being freaked out by this guy?”
“I’m not freaked out, just tired…”
“Who is he?”
“Who is who?," Phillip asked, "Mandy sent me in here to help you. I want to meet your roommate, but she’s not around, Mandy said she was here helping.”
“Phillip, this is my roommate…Taylor.”
(Day 12) “Excuse me? This is your roommate. Surely you jest. They can’t put a guy and a girl together unless they consent and I was there when you filled out the application and you didn’t consent.”
“Calm down Phillip, we have everything worked out. Taylor is my friend and he may threaten your security, but he’s my friend and there is nothing you can do about it.”
“I just have a concern for you that’s all. I need to talk to you about what happened before you left.”
“There’s nothing to talk about so please leave me alone. You understood what I meant then and you have to understand it now.”
(Day 13)“Wait,” he grabbed me at the elbow just as I was moving away, “Just respect what I have tried to do here by coming all the way here. I have a little time and I want to spend it with you.”
“Fine, but let me get my coat…we’re going out Taylor.” I grabbed my coat and got ready to fend my own in this new fight I could feel coming on. We were silent until the dorm was far behind us. Then he spoke with words I wish he had thought about.
“I love you and I want us to go back to the way it was. You’re the only one that understands about my music.”
“Oh don’t give me that you only loved your music and you used me. I understood the passion and love that flows through your viens when you can create, but I could never understand why you forgot about me and the allowences I made so you could do your thing.” I walked away from him flinging my arms in disgust.
“I did love you and I’m sorry. I’ll be better I promise.”
“Promises, promises. I was your “prize” and I was so happy that you actually picked me out of all those girls that worshiped you. But that glitter fell, just like the movie, and I was backstage and never upfront for you. You can’t do both and until you can, no one will love you. I…”
“I have changed. Let me show you. I’m here for a week doing some set up for an album I’m singing in. Please give me this chance. You’ll be my priority too.”
“I don’t know are you strong enough to actually do this for me. I missed you but heartache is too much.” He came and hugged me, holding me close and it made me want to cry. The scent of his cologne brought back memories of him teaching me how to play guitar. Or playing laser tag after the camp gigs he did. Or crying in his sweatshirt when he didn’t show up to my art showing at the studio and blaming it on the camp kids. But the new Phillip might actually fullfil my hopes for us. I never wanted a serious relationship and he changed my mind then hurt me. We walked back to the dorms and rode up the elevator to my room. (Day 14)He hugged me goodnight and I slid into the room.
Taylor lay on the bed reading a book and I caught an evil smirk as he pointed to the digital clock. Its bright red numbers were at 12:00. What did I do for all that time? “Ok I know what you’re thinking, but for most of the time I was yelling at him.”
“How do you know what I was thinking? I am just telling you that it’s a bit late. I’m not your father, but waiting up is what I thought I should do. You looked ready to kill him when you left. Mandy was quite pleased with herself. He was your ex boyfriend right?”
“Yes, but we’re giving it another go…at his insistance. I’m doing it so I can see if he’s become less musically involved. It’s not like I clung to him for dear life, but not hearing from him for a week and him not showing for an important event with my family made me kinda mad. I’d rather not jinx it though.” Then I wisked into our bathroom and got ready for bed.
I came out and he was still reading. He patted bed and that was my que to go sit next to him. It was something your dying grandmother would do as she was telling you how much she loved you before fading into a sleep. But that was Taylor. So I sat.
“So tell me how you plan to make this work?”
“He’s here trying to make an album with someother people and he’s showing me how he can balance music and me.”
“You think that will work? He seemed like a nice guy…a clotheshorse maybe, but hey.”
“I don’t know if it will work but he’s willing to try and make it up to me. He was great at the beginning but I thought it would be better. He just left me out of all the fun music stuff…and I understand his passion for music. It frustrated me to no end and I couldn’t handle it anymore.”
(Day 15)“Such is a music person’s life. No time for relationships…well so I’ve heard.”
“Thanks for the talk Taylor, we better get to bed. Thanks for staying up and waiting for me too. I feel loved.”
I went and turned out the light and pulled the covers down.
“Are you mad at Mandy?”
“I don’t know. She did tell him I was here and encourage him to come and try to win me back. I’m sure my family helped encourage too. They hated our age difference at first, but loved him in the end.”
“Wait he didn’t know you were here?”
“Well I left in anger and he knew I was going to New York City, but there are dozens of colleges here. I didn’t speak to him for a while.”
“Wow, you’ve got this whole big soap opera thing going on and I didn’t even know it.”
“I wish it wasn’t that way, or that he’d of gotten amnesia and forgotten me. Yeah well that was kinda uncalled for but he just beguiles me into doing what he wants. Ok now I’m whining. Goodnight Taylor.”
“Good night troubled Melissa.”


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